Headlines : 26th May, Friday

Rain in Chennai yesterday. Oh , yes. Everyone had a great time. Including ex-Chief Minister Jayalalitha. This was the first time after the elections that she could walk outside without the Sun in her face.

Update on Iraq. In a joint press conference with Tony Blair, US President George Bush has admitted that the progress in Iraq has been not as smooth as expected for the US. Is that the understatement of the year or what ??
Its like saying…….Saurav Ganguly is not playing THAT much cricket these days :-))))

Its like saying the Delhi medical college students and doctors MIGHT be slightly pissed off with Arjun Singh……………..or that Kavya Vishwanathan POSSIBLY downloaded the entire E-book collection of McCafferty’s works on to her laptop.

But considering that the US has been fighting the war in Iraq for around 2 years now, they have very little to show for it in terms of results. George Bush, however, has a sympathizer in Aamir Khan. Aamir knows all about spending a lot of time attempting something that ends in disaster. Remember that ridiculous moustache………. that he grew 3 years just for Mangal Pandey ?

The Saddam Hussein trial is going on in Iraq. Saddam has said that his only aim in life now is to leave his footprints in the sands of time. He means that literally………no metaphors. After all the bombing, all that is left in Iraq is sand and rubble……so it should be fairly easy : – )))

China has rejected U.S. claims that it is a potential military threat to the Asian region. Beijing has spent more than 100 Billion dollars adding high-tech weapons for their 3 million member army. China says this is a purely defensive move to protect itself from the evil plan the US has……… to send Michael Jackson to China. The Great Wall is just not
good enough anymore……..is it ? :-))

Religion. You may have read that the Pope is visiting Poland right now. Due to this, sexy advertisements were put under wraps and a ban on liquor sales went into force in areas that Pope Benedict will visit. This is just to help him out. Why tempt the old man unnecessarily?
But this is not a new concept…….the same procedure was followed in the
US in places where Bill Clinton visited after his sex scandal broke out. It was Hillary’s idea.

The big news from Cannes yesterday. Someone started the rumour that Aishwarya Rai had died in a crash in Sussex, England. There was total chaos. Then, people realised that it was just a hoax and she was very much alive. If only Netaji’s crash could be resolved this easily as well :-)))

For a brief spell, Netaji lost the privilege of being the most famous Indian to have died in a crash.

On to American Idol. Did you know that Americans sent in more than 63 Million votes to decide the winner ? These many votes were never received even during the Presidential elections. How lazy and jobless must these guys have been? Just laying in your couch and keeping on voting……..I am thinking a more suitable name for the show would be ‘ American Idle ‘.

The following articles contributed by Srivats 🙂

The DMK government has ruled that no special treatments will be accorded to VIPs in temples across the state . So no more mahamaham baths for Jayalalitha and her partner Sasikala. The DMK has failed to understand that it was not a case of special treatment but a clever ruse to increase the water level of the tank by a feet and a half.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have gone to Namibia to find some peace. Half of Kashmir had gone to Pakistan just to do that and still there is no sign of peace.

Rolling Stones have postponed their tour of United Kingdom. Its not fair considering they had to cancel their previous to tour to Britain due to world war II.

A bombs parts have been turning up inside potatoes in a British factory making French fried. Seems the British have been searching weapons in all the wrong places.

American diplomats have been warned not to use their newly issued Lenovo computers to store sensitive information like location of Pitt & Jolie’s in Namibia or Britney Spear’s due date from fear of eavesdropping mechanism installed in them by the Chinese government. This from a country which listens when you call Papa Johns for a large pineapple pizza with extra cheese.

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2 comments

  1. Was Amir Khan’s moustache really disastrous ? I don’t recall it having made the headlines even for unflattering reasons.

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  2. It dint make the headlines…true…coz there were so many other things wrong with the movie 🙂

    anyways, was just exhaggerating a bit there…hope you are not an offended Aamir khan fan 🙂

    Like

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