Headlines : 10th June, Saturday

Yep….another hot day in the South. People were sweating like Maradona trying to walk 10 meters.

The PM has taken a tough stance on the petrol issue. He says he is going to start making more tough decisions from now on. Like, today, he chose to wear a blue turban without even asking Sonia if it was ok.

Rahul Mahajan sensationally collapsed in the courtroom yesterday. Just fainted. Splat !!!!
This was just after his lawyer told Rahul that the police had no intention of returning all the cocaine and heroin they had seized from him.

President Kalam has fulfilled his dream of flying in a Sukhoi-30. He later told reporters that it was an amazing experience. Not the ride………what was amazing was that the plane didnt crash-land into some paddy field like it usually does.

JK Rowling has been voted the best British writer alive. Salman Rushdie came in a lowly fourth. Poor guy. I can imagine his ‘Fury’ on listening to this. He has come in second best to a female who writes about some ‘Midnight‘s Children’ fooling around with their magic wands. Rushdie now has to worship the ‘Ground beneath her feet’. What a ‘Shame’ !!
( PS : After winning this poll over Rushdie, JK Rowling is calling him ‘Sal-iman the Clown’ just to rub salt into the wounds. )
<!– D([“mb”,”
Speaking of Rushdie. I have never understood why he is still with Padma
Lakshmi. She is a brainless, anorexic model who routinely exposes just to
get into a trashy magazine cover. It just doesn\’t match, you know. He is
the winner of the \’ Booker of Bookers\’ while she could easily win the
\’Hooker of Hookers\’ award hands down.

Speaking of writers, have some sad news.

Massive floods in China. More than 50 people have been killed. Authorities
are searching for survivors and bodies of other victims. Let me tell you
one thing……Google.com is one place where they wont be
searching………thats for sure………………: – )))

The newest \’Apprentice\’ winner Sean —– has no intention of marrying
soon. I think this makes a lot of sense. Can you imagine him surviving
Donald Trump all this time only to have his wife tell him one fine day – "
Hey Sean…..I am not happy with your work as a husband….file the divorce
papers…….YOU ARE FIRED !!!! "
The following articles by Srivats : -)

Air India and Indian Airlines( presently called Indian )
http://www.hindu.com/2006/06/09/stories/2006060911420100.htm will soon
merge to become one big shit entity. People are looking forward to grandma
reunions.

Indian shooting ace Col Rajyavardhan Singh Rathore gun was misplaced by
Lufthansa airlines during his journey from Cairo. (
http://www.ndtv.com/sports/showsports.asp?sportname\u003dShooting&story\u003dLufthansa+to+return+Rathore\’s+gun&id\u003d28586
). Government source have hinted at ISI involvement to prevent India from
“,1] ); //–>
Speaking of Rushdie. I have never understood why he is still with Padma Lakshmi. She is a brainless, anorexic model who routinely exposes just to get into a trashy magazine cover. It just doesn’t match, you know. He is the winner of the ‘ Booker of Bookers’ while she could easily win the ‘Hooker of Hookers’ award hands down.

Massive floods in China. More than 50 people have been killed. Authorities are searching for survivors and bodies of other victims. Let me tell you one thing……Google.com is one place where they wont be searching………that’s for sure : – )))

The newest ‘Apprentice’ winner Sean Yazbeck has no intention of marrying soon. I think this makes a lot of sense. Can you imagine him surviving Donald Trump all this time only to have his wife tell him one fine day – ” Hey Sean…..I am not happy with your work as a husband….file the divorce papers…….YOU ARE FIRED !!!! “

The following articles by Srivats : -)

Air India and Indian Airlines( presently called Indian ) will soon merge to become one big shit entity. People are looking forward to grandma reunions.

Indian shooting ace Col Rajyavardhan Singh Rathore’s gun was misplaced by Lufthansa airlines during his journey from Cairo. Government source have hinted at ISI involvement to prevent India from securing an Olympic medal. With Rathore out of the way, whole of America is pinning their hopes on homegrown shooting legend Dick Cheney.

The Australian government has urged every one of its citizens to have one child for the country. In fact they are hiring Indians and Chinese to teach the Aussies the art of multiplying.

Just imagine ten thousand beer drinking European men and ten thousand gyrating Latino women put together in a pot and brewed and you get the FIFA football World Cup.

The following articles by Vishwa 🙂

A class X student, who was expecting 100 % results in Social science attempted suicide today. For 14 years now, he had been under the impression that Nepal was the only Hindu kingdom in the world and had answered the same to a question in his exam. But Thanks to Mr. L.K.Advani, he was convinced to conclude that Nepal was Secular. Oh boy… the old man doesn’t seem to learn the fundamental definitions, even after getting screwed for calling Jinnah secular.

To make up for the loss of popularity due to the impending introduction of new IT return form, the department is now trying to storm the media again. This time it has moved (furtively with govt. support), through the SC against Mulayam Singh Yadav. But it is not the most opportune moment for publicity say advertising experts, as it clashes with Football world cup. The last such attempt to be in the media backfired too, when IT was blamed to have made the Big B sick.

The killing of al – Zarqawi isnt exactly a “ showing-middle-finger-on-T.V” kinda of moment for Prez Bush. Instead the whole of senate, including Bush, huddled to identify the next head to bear the $25 million reward as Condoleezza Rice accidentally happen to ask that question. Sources say that our very own Kollywood “Thala” Ajit, plans to drop the title with immediate effect.


While the condom companies in US are foreseeing heavy losses during the Football world cup, the scene in Germany is the direct opposite. The FIIs, who just had pulled out of our market, are apparently investing in German Condom companies. Hence the US plans to start a Condemn Condom Campaign.

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