Headlines : 16th June, Friday

Its still hot and humid in Chennai. People were sweating like Sonia Gandhi’s votebank in Rae bareli.

Yeah, its cheap politics time again. SP Supremo Mulayam Singh Yadav has ordered power supply to be stopped to Sonia Gandhi’s constituency. On the plus side, they avoided wasting their time watching India play cricket in the West Indies.

An amazing piece of news. Did you read about the overweight elephant that is refusing to work out in a tread mill despite its trainers trying all sorts of tactics to make it excercise? This is very bad. Ronaldo shouldn’t be this adamant. At least during the World Cup : – )))

More on the soccer World Cup. I read in the papers that Holland has a toughtie today against Ivory Coast. The Netherlands too have a difficult game against Cote d’Ivorie. The ‘Oranges’ are also playing their match today against the ‘Elephants’. But I am looking forward to the match-up between the Dutch and the African Cup winners.
(P.S : Why the hell does one country need four names? its just confusing everyone)

Union Minister Ram Vilas Paswan is trying to circulate a new pharmaceutical policy that would keep the prices of the 364 essential drugs under govt. control and help the common man. When he heard this, Rahul Mahajan was like- ‘ Finally……………its about time I heard some good news”.

There are 364 ‘essential’ drugs? Never knew that. Why, it looks like Rahul can try a new one every day of the year !!

Navjot Singh Sidhu is joining the anti-quota protests with the IIT Kanpur students. Get mentally prepared for statements like – ‘ Let me tell you one thing my friend……providing quota for OBCs is like pouring cold milk on a sleeping dog. It seems like a good idea but you never get the results you expect”.

On the bright side, this could also starkly highlight to Arjun Singh how the quality of the Institutions would go down with quotas. Think about it…….. Sidhu surrounded by a bunch of brainy IIT guys………thats a telling picture right there……..is this what you want to see Mr. Arjun Singh ?

Due to a shortage of pilots, Jet Airways is now recruiting people without even a CPL (Commercial Pilot’s Licence). I am personally all excited.India is soon going to have its very own 9 / 11. I can see the headlines -‘ Pilot flies his Jet plane smack into the Taj Mahal ‘.

The TN govt. has sent a special task force to Bangalore to find the reason for its success with the IT industry. The advice given was simple and stinging – “For starters, stop spending all your money distributing free colour colour TVs, you morons !! “.

Yes people, it’s up to 2500 now. Not the number of IT notices served to the Big B….no no…… It’s the number US military deaths in Iraq so far.

An Islamic cleric has called for George Bush to convert to Islam. He is asking the wrong President for sure. Had it been Clinton, he would have willingly converted, if only for the 72 virgin interns waiting for him in Heaven.

Was amazed today when I read that scientist Stephen Hawking still has a wife. With all due respect to the great man, he is nothing more than an artificial voice sitting expressionless on a chair all day. Kinda like Amitabh Bachan in KBC. Women……..can never understand them.

The following articles by Vishwa 🙂

Rahul mahajan hugged his jail buddies before going out on bail. How moving!! sob sob.. He said he liked his freedom, pubs and …Fanaa…. But Rakhi sawant wants to know if it was a mere hug or was their smooch?

Microsoft sets up lab at Anna University. Karunanidhi wants 70% of the facility to be reserved through legislation, by setting access restrictions. Any OC student accessing the reserved facility to be charged under every even-numbered section of constitution!!

Unable to convince CM, that the interface cannot possibly have check boxes for every caste, Bill Gates plans to quit Microsoft. DMK has earlier promised MS office, MS games etc as a part of their manifesto and now are forcing Bill gates Gates wants to continue his education from where he had left.

Delhi Univ. installs spy cams to curtail ragging. It turns out that they ended up filming several informative movies of DPS MMS genre. Management is likely to upgrade the cam and picture quality in due course. Some doctors from TN, top army officials in Kashmir have shown interest to buy and sell those videos, and Mahesh butt will take care of production.

Pak challenges India for Top UN post by nominating its prime minister. When we tested N weapon, they too did; we struck N-deal with US, they did with china. Seeking to do something that Musharaf can’t even imagine doing, our PM prostrated at Sonia’s feet. … What a man…
Coincidentally Ronaldo’s dizziness comes at a time when German hookers are overworked. Yet people doubt his potency to ‘shoot it in’.

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