Headlines : 13th July, Thursday

The good news first. Mumbai is back on its feet. The city has shown remarkable strength of spirit and character. Today, people were carrying on with their daily lives as if nothing had happened. Must have been a slap in the face of the terrorists who orchestrated these explosions. Those bastards are probably thinking – ‘How rude !!!’

Even more amazingly, kids in Mumbai were all back in school the very next day. That’s right. For one thing, they preferred listening to boring lessons in Algebra rather than sit at home and watch the million (so-called) News Channels play the gory images of people dying over and over again.

Our PM Manmohan Singh has saluted the people of Mumbai and the sense of friendship and togetherness they expressed during the tragedy. Afterall, if there is one person who knows what it is like to be without friends right now, it is our Prime Minister.

Sonia was in Mumbai to offer her support. She condemned those who carried out this dastardly act. She said – “Why can’t the terrorists just blow up people in Kashmir as usual? That’s the agreement, isn’t it? They can have their fun in Kashmir and no one has any issues………Now they want to start doing it all over the country? This cannot be pardoned.”

Lalu Yadav has offered to anything he can do to help. That’s sweet. But is that what we need at this juncture? Lalu fooling around out with the investigation and relief operations? Incidentally, this is the biggest disaster to happen to the Indian Railways since Lalu Prasad took over as the Railway Minster.

As expected, the Mumbai police have no idea who is behind these attacks. So far, their suspects include the ever-present Lashkar-e-Taiba and an old man found commuting ticketless in the Ladies compartment.

Finance Minister P Chidambaram has assured everyone that the blasts will definitely not pull the economy down. Of course, not. His shoddy economic policies and the constant bickering from the Congress’ allies have taken care of that already.

The Israelis must be crazy. They are now bombing Lebanon as well as Palestine for that one soldier. More and more violence. What’s wrong with these Jews? I am starting to wonder if Hitler was right all along…….

A refreshing change in the behaviour of members of the TN Assembly today. There was no throwing of mikes or slippers. They were just head-butting the hell out of each other.

Zidane has now apologised for his infamous head-butting incident. Especially to the millions of children who were watching the world cup on TV. All that’s fine but isn’t he forgetting the millions of children who are seeing the clip on Youtube ? And the millions of children who got it through e-mail forwards? And the children watching the repeat telecast on ESPN at the Neverland ranch?

Entertainment news. ‘The Pirates of the Caribbean’ have done well all around the world and made millions of dollars. But the sad part. When they tried to come to India, they got hit by a falling ISRO satellite and sunk without a trace into the Bay of Bengal.

The following articles by Boston 🙂

It is again one of those hopeless losers bombing innocent civilians in trains again, never realising that killing people is not going to change anything!
Why don’t these guys try something innovative, like blowing up the Railway minister if someone is unhappy about Indian Railways, Education Minister for a better Education system, Petroleum minister for lower fuel prices and blow up the Defense minister if he keeps blowing up the satellites. The good thing is the new minister who replaces these dead ones is sure not to commit a mistake for life!

Michael Dell’s stress on an explosive growth for his company has confused the company’s stakeholders with a recent incident where a Dell Laptop exploded Obviously, Mr. Dell was “being true to his words”.

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