Headlines : 17th July, Monday

The G8 summit is being held in Russia this time. It is so cold there that the other leaders are slowly realising the wisdom of wearing a huge turban to cover you head and ears.

The PM is really keen on speaking his mind out at the G8 summit. You know, express himself. Obviously. He hardly gets a chance to that when he is with Sonia or the Allies of the UPA government. This is going to be a refreshing change for him.

Manmohan Singh’s main agenda at the summit is to blast Pakistan for supporting terrorism with a strongly worded speech. That’s good. Meanwhile, the Pakistanis are actually going about blasting trains and buildings all over India. As they say, actions speak louder than words.

In fact, our PM spoke personally to the US President George Bush and requested him to help India in the war against terror. When he said terror, he was of course referring to the DMK and the Left parties.

Speaking of Bush………..he said at a press conference that he was very happy to be in Russia. He also expressed a desire to visit the USSR if possible since he heard it was somewhere close by.

Update on the blasts. The Anti-Terrorist Squad has said that forensic reports reveal the use of RDX in the seven blasts that rocked Mumbai. Great. Let’s summarise the progress in the investigations. So far, we have established that there were 7 blasts and explosives like RDX were used to do it. Wow! Amazing speed and intelligence indeed…..the next step is to determine if any humans set off the bombs or it just was the handiwork of some excitable rhesus monkeys.

Pakistan has responded to criticism by saying that there are absolutely no terrorists in its grounds. I am sure there aren’t. All those bastards are over here in India once their training in Pakistan was over.

Here’s a disturbing trend. Fewer and fewer students are opting for science courses in Universities these days in India. But then, does it really matter? Our rockets and satellites are destined to end up in the Bay of Bengal anyways……..doesn’t matter who is doing the honours, right?

Israel is continuing with its bombing of Lebanon for the sixth day. This is to save two kidnapped soldiers by the Hezbollah in Lebanon. Wow…….the Jews never had it so good. There was a time when millions of them were killed together and no one raised their voice. Now, you touch one of them and Boom!!! – you better watch out mister.

This is priceless. In an unusual prayer for world peace, around 3000 residents of Poovalur village in TN, performed marriage to two donkeys in the ancient Sri Thirumoola Natha Swamy Temple. How much stupider can we get? By my calculations, there were not 2 but 3002 asses at the wedding.


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